WasAnnon
Slow pace in the most part of the movie.
InformationRap
This is one of the few movies I've ever seen where the whole audience broke into spontaneous, loud applause a third of the way in.
Stephan Hammond
It is an exhilarating, distressing, funny and profound film, with one of the more memorable film scores in years,
Yash Wade
Close shines in drama with strong language, adult themes.
bensonmum2
There are a lot of bad movies, but there's only one Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe. If you want poor acting, a nonsensical plot, unbelievably low quality sound recording/editing, a pointless Jim Belushi cameo, and inappropriate soft jazz, Abraxas is the movie you've been looking for.Abraxas stars Jesse Ventura in the title role. While I enjoyed his work in movies like The Predator, he seems wholly incapable of carrying a movie on his own. He's joined by Sven-Ole Thorsen - Arnold Schwarzenegger's old buddy. A large chunk of the movie is devoted to these two guys chasing each other through the woods and mindlessly beating on each other. The third main member of the cast is Marjorie Bransfield. I'll be incredibly nice and call her performance bland.The plot is so ridiculous, it's barely worth mentioning. Abraxas is some sort of space cop called a finder who is chasing his former partner, Secundus. Secundus has come to Earth to find a suitable mate to bear his child. His offspring will be the Comater and have knowledge of the Anti-Life Equation. Secundus finds a female, impregnates her with a hand to the belly, and the baby (or Comater) is born within a few minutes. Abraxas catches up with Secundus and sends him to a penal planet. Five years later, Secundus escapes prison and heads back to Earth (with Abraxas hot on his heels) to retrieve the Comater so he might gain the power derived from the Anti-Life Equation. I'll stop there. This is all so pointless.I've always said that I rate movies based on entertainment. Abraxas is a test of that statement. It's a bad movie based on anyone's definition. It's totally ridiculous, stupid, and incompetently made - but it's fun. Despite the many obvious flaws, I was entertained. A qualified 7/10 from me.
The Grand Master
Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe feels like the entire movie was written by a child for a primary school assignment. The entire movie resembles something that was made up by a child. I probably could have written this for a short story for a school assignment in school and get a good mark. How this was made into a movie I'll never know. I don't know where to start on how bad this movie is. From the nonsensical and unintentionally laughably pathetic dialogue, rubbish action sequences, woeful explosions, and poor attempts at violence. I was shocked to see James Belushi pop up in a cameo as an incompetent school principal, most likely done as a favour for someone.Jesse Ventura (Predator, The Running Man) plays an intergalactic police officer named Abraxas who has been sent back to Earth to stop a rogue alien named Secundus played by Sven-Ole Thorsen (well known character actor who has appeared in Conan The Barbarian, Lethal Weapon, The Running Man, Red Heat among others). Secundus is looking for a woman on Earth to impregnate so she can bear his child to carry on his legacy.Where have I seen this before??? Oh yes, this is a low grade rip off of Arnold Schwarzenegger's classic sci-fi movie The Terminator (1984). Even so, this movie miserably fails.Look no further than the atrocious dialogue present throughout the movie and you get the idea on how bad this movie is. Referring to a box containing "VD" - Vibrational Detection. That is laughable. But wait, there's more. "T-squared", "Volted", "Pla-Steel", "Comater", "Answer Box" and "Anti-life equation". Wow, sounds like these words have been plucked out of a Maths class. I'm still scratching my head here. Are you sure this story wasn't derived from a Primary School assignment? There are so many plot holes throughout the movie as well. Characters that just disappear and serve no purpose throughout the movie? Rookie error. Small town Deputy Sheriff officers carrying Uzi's in their patrol car as well as outdated .38 Revolvers?! No way! Besides, these two deputies are nothing more than a pair of hapless, dim-witted clowns that couldn't catch a cold. Jesse Ventura and Sven-Ole Thorsen both share the distinction of appearing with Arnold Schwarzenegger in numerous movies throughout the 1980's. Both actors also shared the screen along with Arnold Schwarzenegger in Predator (1987) and The Running Man (1987). Fellas, you are great in small roles and character actors respectively, but you will never be in the same league as Arnold Schwarzenegger.Unless you want to have a good laugh at how pathetic this movie is, go ahead and watch it. But this will be 90 minutes that you will never get back. Alternatively, just find all copies of this movie and blast it into outer space.1/10.
Flak_Magnet
This cheesed out, very low budget sci-fi thriller is supbar in every way. Jesse Ventura is easily the film's strong point, as his performance, along with a medium dose of unintentional comedy, are the film's only saving graces. You'll get about 20-min of filler chase scenes in this movie, with either Ventura or the bad guy pursuing someone through the woods, and after the 4th of these sequences, it became quite clear that the filmmakers were running out of stuff to show us. Throw in an exhausted (and quite unnecessary) romantic subplot, a lot of mother/son screen time, where the mother of the alien boy shows us how committed a mom she is; and a bizarre comedic cameo from Jim Belushi, and you're getting started. Now toss in amateur camera-work, cartoon laser effects, an unnecessary pair of town deputy characters, and a "Terminator 2" style plot, with Ventura traveling to Earth to protect a child who carries a dangerous intergalactic secret, and you're almost there. Finally, I have to mention the fight scenes, which are abysmal, as is the wooden acting from ALL the Earthlings. The score is more appropriate for a soft-core p0rno, with Kenny G-style sax performances, and there weren't enough laughs to merit the time waste. We were groaning through this one in the final 20-min, and we booed the ending heartily. Unfortunately, mates, this one just stinks. Avoid.
winner55
the big question is, as professional wrestlers go, does Jesse "the Body" Ventura make a better actor than governor of a mid-West state with economic troubles? And the answer is: No.Whew! for a minute there, I thought we were going to have problems.Except for the Body himself, the acting in this film is pretty good, and the script and direction indicate that there is a real vision here, and that the writer-director has some talent worth developing. The scene in the burning warehouse where the young boy is being tracked down by the bad-guy is genuinely scary.However, the low budget prevented this film from reaching any potential - beyond that of an enjoyable throwaway for Saturday afternoons when the weather's ho-hum and you're looking for some excuse not to mow the lawn. but on that level, as forgettable filler, it's not so bad.