Jemima
It's a movie as timely as it is provocative and amazingly, for much of its running time, it is weirdly funny.
jokernharleyqpsn
This movie was the worst thing I've ever seen, that's why I'm going to buy it for my teacher who hates comic sans, and bad camera work
azathothpwiggins
BIRDEMIC: SHOCK AND TERROR, tells a tale that must be told. After an opening drive, where we are made to feel... every... inch... of the trip, during which, music plays like someone twisting sharpened toothbrush handles into our ear-holes, we are introduced to the main characters. He is Rod (Alan Bragh). She is Nathalie (Whitney Moore). Their footfalls are each unique. His are the sound of feet padding through popcorn. Hers, like someone skating over Lincoln logs. He is a phone solicitor. She is a model. This is a love story. We know this, due to the conversation between Rod and Nathalie, resembling two exhaust fans humming, while eating Chinese food. Suddenly, cartoon birds fly -more like swim- by, symbolizing desire, or perhaps they are harbingers of what must unfold. Nah! They're just fun-loving cartoon birds flapping along, accentuating the love of these two living appliances. Minutes drip like honey, turning into hours, then days, then... eons. Rod chatters on about whatever it is he's selling. An art festival / pumpkin show! Love is everywhere they look. A walk on the beach, and a cartoon bird lies dead. Thankfully, nothing whatsoever occurs. Rod and Nathalie cut a rug, while a statue sings rhythm and blues. Jump back! Nathalie does "The Robot"! Time for love, and kissing that sounds as though someone is trying to suck a watermelon through a snorkel. Upon awakening, after their night of loving-ness, cartoon birds are everywhere! Cartoon explosions happen for no reason! Doom has arrived on CGI wings of awful death! Rod and Nathalie are joined by another couple. Hangers are used as cartoon bird swatters. Hovering fowl move side to side, prefiguring our coming demise. Hovering in unison, always turned away from us, signifying their disdain. Toy guns are no match for these phlying phantasms! An old man on a bridge explains the horror. Global warming has caused cartoon birds to attack fossil fuel-using humans. Humans must go! We are bad! a woman stops to answer nature's call, only to be called upon by an angry eagle. Yes, even toilet paper is offensive to these sensitive, cartoon guardians of virtue. Traffic goes by, almost as if they can't see the birds! What black magic is this? Bus passengers are "bombed" w/ flesh-eating waste. Take that, human monsters! Let's see you pollute the air, now! Ha! Listen to the cartoon birds, man! They know! Quick, into the woods, where there are probably no birds. Probably. Luckily, a man in a Cher wig explains the situation, so that our guilt can be made complete. Bravo!...
creatureofthereel
Well, the title immediately grabbed my attention, I love films like this, Asylum and Syfy films are where I go when I want to be entertained easily and don't have to follow the plot. Birdemic is in a league of its own, I have watched a couple of times now and I still cannot decide whether the actors believe this is a serious role or that they are fully aware of how bad the film is so don't really try to act! This doesn't mean I didn't enjoy the movie, I did enjoy it, it made me laugh and reminds me that almost any film can bring enjoyment as long as you don't get all "film elitist" Watch it, its fun. Then watch the second.
zerovector-44707
Possibly the finest acting, story, editing, and sound engineering ever committed to film.What happens when a director/writer completes a masterpiece?What movie can fill the empty hole in your life?What is the meaning of life?Where can we look for answers?Birdemic is the answer to all of these questions.