ThiefHott
Too much of everything
SpuffyWeb
Sadly Over-hyped
Robert Joyner
The plot isn't so bad, but the pace of storytelling is too slow which makes people bored. Certain moments are so obvious and unnecessary for the main plot. I would've fast-forwarded those moments if it was an online streaming. The ending looks like implying a sequel, not sure if this movie will get one
Hattie
I didn’t really have many expectations going into the movie (good or bad), but I actually really enjoyed it. I really liked the characters and the banter between them.
vitnamee
If you were looking for a generic horror movie this is it. I would like to call BS on most of the deaths. I say that because even a modestly aware person would notice a potential threat coming. ******spoiler**** I reference the snowman death, are you telling me that a killer is able to sneak up on the character coming from the person's front? One may cite blocked line of sight, but really, its like if a killer was fat and trying to hide behind a twig. Another ***spoiler*** clichés like watch alarm going off randomly when hiding from said killer is very lame. One last bull crap that urked me was when one character, sees their friend get killed, runs out of the house... then stops may 30 feet from the house to take a breather...I say I am a horror junkie and some films are going to be subpar, but I would think that directors would try to be smart about it.
Bloodmarsh Krackoon
Are you tired of all the fake reviews? You just know it's the director, or one of those terrible actors sitting behind their computer screens, writing whatever it takes to get you to watch their truly awful horror films, right? Do not fear, Krackoon is here - and I trash on, well, just about everything.So, what about 'Dismembering Christmas?' Well, after the credits started to roll, I wanted to disremember ever seeing it. You can pretty much guess what you're in for, when you read the phrase 'a group of friends,' because you know there's going to be a cabin, and a person wearing a really cheap mask, right around the corner. So, if you want your halls decked with bad acting, horrible sound/music, poorly written dialogue, then 'Dismembering Christmas' is as good as the director, who wrote the fake review, says it is. The dialogue here is about as robotic as I've seen in a while - 'Sam.. we.. have.. to.. get.. out.. of.. here' These people make Robocop seem like your average every day guy.The acting is about three notches below bad - The 'Joan' character just paves the way for how bad it's going to get. I must apologize here, because when 'Joan' first made her appearance, I thought the character was actually played by a male dressed in drag. It wasn't until I loaded up IMDb, that I found out the part is actually played by Marla Van Lanen, whom I assume is actually a female. Sorry, Marla. It was an honest mistake.Random Ramblings of a Madman: Fake reviews aren't going to go away, but let's be honest here - If you thought a movie called 'Dismembering Christmas,' was going to be anything but bad - who is really to blame?
mrhorrorpants
Slasher Studios always prioritizes character likability, and these efforts make Dismembering Christmas fun from beginning to end. When the killer arrived, I found myself worrying about my favorite characters. When the blood started to fly, and when I realized no one was safe, they had me at the edge of my seat.Watching the film brought back so many video store memories I found myself searching for a big, black clamshell case with the logo on it.My only regret was that I watched it alone. Dismembering Christmas is made for a living room filled with friends to gasp and giggle along with you. It will be a movie horror fans watch every holiday, as well as when the mood strikes them in the other three seasons. Put on a holiday sweater and enjoy!
gavin6942
Not long ago, Slasher Studios screened their film "Don't Go to the Reunion" before a full house at HorrorHound Indianapolis. The crowd cheered, laughed, and it was a big hit. Maybe not scary, but the kind of movie you want to see with some friends and a few beers.Now they're back... with a vengeance. That same great mix of blood and belly laughs, but with an improved video quality, some great camera shots, and a beautiful soundtrack. We even have a killer with black gloves, which can only be a nod to the great Italian giallo films. (Indeed, in some respects this is more of a mystery than a slasher, at least for the first half.) "Dismembering" retains that independent feel. There is still some amateur acting at times (one actress in particular) and minor sound issues that come from not having a sound stage or boom mics, but it's part of the Slasher Studios charm. This is a low-budget, high-fun film. Most of the actors double as crew – including the director-editor (Austin Bosley) and makeup artist (Marla VanLanen). And for being shot over 12 days, it comes off as quite professional. (Even notorious rush artists like Jim Wynorski typically allow 17 days in case of retakes.) Though he did get a "thanks" on "Reunion", hinting at some sort of involvement, director Austin Bosley is new to the Slasher Studios family. He has acted and directed a few things, but one hopes he sticks around with this group a while. He seems to have the magic touch. (With all due respect to Slasher Studios' former regular director Steve Goltz, who co-wrote this screenplay.) Worth singling out is the actor who plays Mark: Baker Chase; he is the strongest of the cast – a good actor, with a good look, who has a bright future if he wants it. His IMDb credits show him very busy over the next year or two, and it would be no shock if he made the transition to mainstream films or television.Slasher fans will have to check this out. Christmas and slashers have been going hand in hand since the 1970s, but never before have they been this highly entertaining. This Christmas, be sure to deck the halls with lots of bodies!