Matialth Good concept, poorly executed.

Executscan Expected more

Jacomedi A Surprisingly Unforgettable Movie!

PiraBit if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

Python Hyena Half Past Dead (2002): Dir: Don Michael Paul / Cast: Steven Seagal, Ja Rule, Morris Chestnut, Nia Peeples, Claudia Christian: Another pathetic excuse for an action film and it is about as stupid as they get. Title seems to suggest a near death experience that the victim overcomes. The victim is Steven Seagal who took a bullet for hoodlum buddy Ja Rule. He recovers and goes undercover inside a prison where he encounters Ja Rule again. Apparently Rule's boss killed Seagal's wife although he sees him as a friend despite his poor life choices. Central plot regards the planning at an Alcatrez type prison for an execution of an elderly man guilty of killing innocent people during a robbery attempt. He stole and hid gold bars and only gives the whereabouts to Seagal. The plot is reduced to numerous violent encounters where bullets parade the air. Director Don Michael Paul does well with the action with Seagal still playing an overblown ass-kicking moron that he has played in every other witless film that he saw as a great acting opportunity. Ja Rule tags along in a role played by numerous other actors in Seagal films. He is that moron sidekick who helps ass kick. Also wasted are Morris Chestnut and Nia Peeples who hopefully won't have to suffer career damage forever because of this. Pointless garbage to the very end this film should be re-titled Half Past Dense. Score: 2 / 10

Jackson Booth-Millard I had always had my opinion about the leading star of this film, and only ever really liked him in Under Siege, but in recent times I decided to give him a chance and try his films, and this was another one of them. Basically car thief Sasha Petrosevitch (Razzie nominated Steven Seagal) is brought in by criminal Nicolas 'Nick' Frazier (rapper Ja Rule) working for crime boss Sonny Eckvall (Richard Bremmer), who apparently killed his wife. During the job however FBI Special Agent Ellen 'EZ' Williams (Claudia Christian) catch the team, and Sascha ends up getting shot, and for eight months he is medically dead, until his recovery finally works, and he is immediately imprisoned in Alcatraz. He joins Nick and the many other dangerous and petty criminal inmates in the infamous prison that has only just been reopened by new charismatic Warden El Fuego (Tony Plana), and the place is equipped with a new state-of-the-art execution chamber. The dead men walking can choose from the five methods of death: gas chamber, lethal injection, electrocution, hanging or firing squad, and the first criminal to face the new facility is gold heist thief Lester McKenna (Bruce Weitz). Watching the execution to see how the system works are Supreme Court Justice Judge June McPherson (Linda Thorson) and Federal Bureau of Prisons head Frank Hubbard (Stephen J. Cannell), but also interested in getting their hands on McKenna is a team of terrorists, called the "49ers". They are led by number one, Donald Robert Johnson (Boyz n the Hood's Morris Chestnut) who wants the stash of gold that has been hidden by the man on death row, and as he won't tell them Johnson is holding the Judge and others ransom to get what they want. Obviously Sascha are trapped inside as well, and they decide to do something about the situation, fighting back, but of course we find out Sascha is actually an undercover cop trying to find Sonny Eckvall. With the help of the other inmates, including Twitch (Kurupt) and Little Joe (Michael 'Bear' Taliferro), and in the end Alcatraz goes back supposedly to its original state, the villain is defeated, and Sascha does rescue the Judge and others. Also starring Nia Peeples as 49er Six, Michael McGrady as Guard Damon J. Kestner and Hannes Jaenicke as Agent Hartmann. Seagal is reasonably okay as the at first unlikely but then obvious hero, and his high kicks certainly make for alright viewing, some of the story was in ways interesting, but overall it is almost a rip-off of The Rock and other similar films, so not much originality, and not the highest amount of satisfaction, a sort of silly action crime thriller. Adequate!

bobwildhorror What a dog. Saw this on a cable station the other evening. They actually changed the title to something less memorable. Must be the network was afraid too many people would recognize the original title of this train wreck.This movie sucked on so many levels that I'm at a loss where to begin. The acting? Well, Steven Seagal will never get an Academy Award, but his efforts here left me dumbstruck. He's a gangster of some sort. You can tell because he speaks in a stilted "street" language that makes him sound impaired. To be fair, that's not his fault. It's obviously the result of a script written by a white guy who wanted to inject ethnic credibility into a prison movie...and failed miserably. Ja Rule comes along for the ride. The best thing I can say about his performance is that he wears a tank top to show us he's tattooed and prison buff.Speaking of which, is Steven so out of shape that he has to cover his physique with heavy coats? Throughout the entire film he's sporting some kind of jacket. It doesn't matter where he is: in prison (where they apparently have no dress code for a star of Seagal's stature), on the run from the law, or in bed with his girlfriend.And I hate to be harsh, but Don Michael Paul's direction does nothing to help the situation. An action movie requires action sequences, not badly choreographed fights that are shot from random angles. Even the explosions - and there are plenty of explosions - are boring. Apparently, they're also invisible explosions, because no matter how many buildings and cars Steven blows up, the law can't follow his trail of carnage.This is really bad, bad stuff. I actually felt bad for Seagal. He never made masterpieces, but this is like a stick in the eye compared to UNDER SIEGE.

BroadswordCallinDannyBoy When this film hit theaters Steven Seagal still had a presence on the big screen. After this film, he has only made small screen films. In seeing this film it is very easy to see why. Bluntly put: In "Half Past Dead" there is not the faintest glimmer of anything that slightly resembles something original. The only real good thing about this film is the catchy title (arguably good for a straight forward action flick) and somewhat clever tagline that references one the best all time films, both of which are probably the only reason this film made it to the big screen.When watching this film you can see plenty of ironies. The set pieces are good enough for a big screen film, but the editing and cinematography omit key seconds that would normally show such things as blood in order to secure the "commercially safe" PG-13 rating. Roger Ebert's point about this was golden. The lack of profanity seems odd since the movie is all about violent criminals. The supposed star shows not one bit of muscle due to his wearing a trench coat. The opening scene has the hero and his buddy driving as if they are being chased only they are not being chased and due to that editing mentioned earlier it looks like people are not shooting at anything. What's the point of all this? Even the main villain has one of the most ridiculous deaths that is nothing like a big cop out for a finale.What does heroes escaping in a car from nothing, people shooting at nothing and the hero and villain of an action film not even having one fight all add up to? The answer is hard to pinpoint, but it is even worse than your typical direct-to-DVD action movie that has no stars in it. At least those movies don't cheat you out of what you want to see: violence. And if a movie shows violence, it might as well show it in full. Since showing people getting shot but as long as there is no blood is seemingly "appropriate" for kids, is simply absurd. And the results as displayed here are Full Past Ridiculous. --- 2/10BsCDb classification: Ages 13+ -- violence