MamaGravity good back-story, and good acting

Peereddi I was totally surprised at how great this film.You could feel your paranoia rise as the film went on and as you gradually learned the details of the real situation.

Grimossfer Clever and entertaining enough to recommend even to members of the 1%

Sienna-Rose Mclaughlin The movie really just wants to entertain people.

GL84 After dying and coming back to life as vampires, two women try to control their advanced powers in a new world but can't escape their pasts as they threaten their secret life and their friendship and forcing them to choose life or death.Overall, this was a pretty decent and enjoyable if slightly flawed vampire effort. The main thing about this one is the fact that it tends to take an entirely different take on the genre which is not only wholly original but helps this one immensely by allowing this to take a different route through the story. By making the change occur as a result of a cosmic gift rather than a viral infection to be spread through neck-bites or blood-drinking, there's a different ethereal feel to them and how they go about being involved in the different confrontations takes a rather unusual turn here by keeping the remaining qualities of the creatures intact beyond this one simplistic change. That allows for some great moments in the diner where those powers are put into effect as there's the being impervious to bullets which makes for a fine shoot-out against the hapless officer, the superhuman strength which makes for quite an interesting brawl mid-way through where they get slammed through the surroundings to the point of breaking a normal human to pieces but they survive to continue the fight and even the burning of the skin due to the sunlight so there's the suspense of barricading themselves inside and how long that can work. As well with the plentiful and abundant nudity, these make up for some rather good times but it does have a couple problems with this. The most significant is the fact that the entire film is mostly centered around the diner so it feels way too stagnant and doesn't really seem like it actually does anything here which is quite troubling by letting scenes just go on and on just to eat up time. The fighting between the two is hardly all that original or interesting and these scenes are just maddeningly endless where one wants to exploit their powers and the other is trying to get her under control so they can utilize their powers for the better of their lives, and considering the amount of struggle that went into letting the one get imbued with those vampiric powers that really should've been seen coming quite early on so that kinda takes away from the burgeoning need to have to do that the film is clearly building towards. This does lead to a rather anti-climactic finale since it was clearly set-up from the beginning yet there's nothing really surprising about it, and when combined with the other flaws is a little disappointing.Rated R: Graphic Language, Continuous Nudity, Graphic Violence and mild drug use.

MBunge After watching this awe inspiringly wretched thing, I am convinced that if I asked filmmaker Ron Carlson to write "The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog", what he'd produce would be "The quick brown fox, the quick brown fox, the quick brown fox, apple 37 Zanzibar". That's how poorly written Life Blood is, it makes me suspect Carlson either has some sort of learning disability or suffered a kind of brain damage, either through an industrial accident or spending a little too much time in auto-erotic asphyxiation. From concept to plot to dialog, your average six year old could come up with a more logical and entertaining story that this. It's so bad that it's one of those films where you literally don't understand how anyone read the script and then agreed to be in it. I mean, how to you get past the part about lesbian vampires gestating for 40 years under the desert, only to emerge in their underwear and start walking down the highway without going "Wait…what?"Brooke and Rhea (Sophie Monk and Anya Lahiri) are two lovers fleeing a party where Brooke killed a guy, only for God (Angela Lindvall) to strike down Brooke and offer to turn Rhea into a vampire. Brooke agrees, but only if God also turns Brooke into a bloodsucker. 4 decades later, they emerge from their cocoons and while Rhea thinks of themselves as avenging angels who are only supposed to go after evil people, Brooke just wants to take a bite out of anyone who gets in her way. After Brooke chomps a good samaritan and a hitchhiker, the pair flee the rising sun and take refuge in a roadside convenience store. Brooke hassles the hapless clerk until she and Rhea get into a fight and Brooke kills her. Brooke then goes on a killing spree that involves a vacationing family and the local sheriff's office before God in a see-thru top returns and brings Rhea back to life for a final showdown.Let me get the one good thing about Life Blood out of the way. Patrick Renna as the hapless convenience store clerk is friggin' amazing. His character is smarter and more believable, his dialog is genuinely funny and everything about his performance is 100 times better than anything else in the film. Renna has got to be ad libbing at least 98% of his role and doing a great job of it. Compared to the rest of the cast, it's like Renna's doing Hamlet to put Laurence Olivier to shame. If the other actors were given the same freedom as Renna, their work here means they should never, ever be allowed to ad lib again. There's no other explanation for how this one actor and one supporting character could be light years beyond everything else in the production.This is a very low budget flick, the kind when there's a scene on a supposedly deserted stretch of highway, you can clearly see traffic moving through the background of the shot. For cheap cinema, however, this looks perfectly fine. The problem here isn't a lack of money. It's a total lack of intelligence and aptitude.I could criticize practically every single second of Life Blood that doesn't involve Patrick Renna, but I'll limit myself to two examples in the interest of brevity. After Sophie's first two kills, the girls drive off in the pickup truck of one of her victims. The truck is hauling one of those rounded silver campers, the kind that used to be popular before RVs became more common. When dawn comes, the vampires fear the sun and stop at the convenience store, run in and try and block out the light. Why didn't they just go in the camper? It has smaller, easier to cover windows. It's right there behind the truck. If the camper is not there for them to hide in…what is it there for?!?! It doesn't serve any other purpose and isn't even mentioned by any of the characters. It may seem like a niggling little detail, but any viewer with an IQ above 50 is going to get to this section of the film and ask "Why aren't they going in the camper?"The other example is that a sheriff's deputy is played by Danny Woodburn. You may not recognize the name, but he's the little person who played Mickey on Seinfeld. Now, even though we live in a politically correct world, little people do not get to be sheriff's deputies just like 7 foot tall guys do no get to serve on submarines. There are physical limitations that prevent it. If you're going to cast a little person as a member of law enforcement, there needs to be a reason for it, even if it's just as a joke, and there is no joke or any other reason for it here. Woodburn could have switched roles with any other member of the cast, male or female, and it would have made more sense.Life Blood is horrendous storytelling. The fact that neither Sophie Monk nor Anya Lahiri get naked, even though they're playing lesbian vampires in an R rated horror movie, defies rationalization. Anyone who watches this and claims to enjoy it should be held 24 hours for psychiatric evaluation.

JoeB131 Turdblossom. Would have made as much sense as "Pearblossom", the working title. The only thing I can take from the "good" reviews is once again, people involved in the "production" are writing them to give the thing positive buzz... sad, really.The dreadful plot is that a couple of lesbians are at a New Years Eve Party in 1969 (or maybe it's 1968, they say both) when one of them kills an actor for no apparent reason and they drive off into the desert for no apparent reason, only to be turned into Vampires by God (who for some reason is a chick in a see-through blouse.) God informs one of them that there mission is to kill evil people, but, blah, blah, blah, who cares.What is side splittingly funny are the implausibilities in this film. Such as the daughter of a couple of tourists being locked in her parent's SUV for the whole film. (Sorry, cars don't work like that. YOu have to be able to get out, the locks are for keeping people from getting in!) Or the rural sheriff's department that hires a midget deputy. (This guy has been in a bunch of horror films over the years, so I guess they hired him because you've heard of him, maybe?) But the capper is the incomprehensible dialog. Like the writer was too busy thinking about girl-on-girl action to actually have the girls say something intelligent when their tongues weren't shoved down each other's throats...

heartspill What a waste of time.I watched about 30 min of this poor film before I had to turn it off. Even the two hot leads did not make me linger on..The script is so poor and contains so much repetition that I'm wondering if the writer just made use of the copy/paste function a bit too often while he was watching lesbian soft porn on the internet instead of coming up with a better story line. Lines like "What is happening?" or "I don't know what is happening" occur numerous times during the first 30 min of the movie, mostly uttered in blocks of 4 to 5 in a row. I wished somebody would throw her the script (at her head), that might have given her an insight. But then again..Not only do the two lead characters make out frequently but also does god, appearing as a female, kiss one of the girls. I mean, WTF? Just don't bother watching it. It really, really isn't worth it.