Malibu Express

1985 "Packing Heat From Texas To Malibu Beach"
4.8| 1h41m| R| en| More Info
Released: 01 March 1985 Released
Producted By: Malibu Bay Films
Country: United States of America
Budget: 0
Revenue: 0
Official Website:
Synopsis

In this erotic spy tale private eye Cody Abilene teams up with the Contessa Luciana and policewoman Beverly McAfee to infiltrate a mansion and discover who is sending computer secrets to the Russians.

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Malibu Bay Films

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Reviews

ReaderKenka Let's be realistic.
Merolliv I really wanted to like this movie. I feel terribly cynical trashing it, and that's why I'm giving it a middling 5. Actually, I'm giving it a 5 because there were some superb performances.
Grimossfer Clever and entertaining enough to recommend even to members of the 1%
Married Baby Just intense enough to provide a much-needed diversion, just lightweight enough to make you forget about it soon after it’s over. It’s not exactly “good,” per se, but it does what it sets out to do in terms of putting us on edge, which makes it … successful?
BA_Harrison This is the first film I've watched from my Andy Sidaris 12-film box set (aptly titled Girls, Guns and G-Strings) and if I had any sense it would probably be the last (sadly, I have very little nous when it comes to my choice in film, so it looks like I have my work cut out for me). Sidaris's formula is simple: dumb action films with dumb heroes and sexy women. The men boast big 'taches, big guns and big muscles; the women sport big hair, big tits, and unfeasibly tiny outfits. But while this might sound like B-movie heaven, in Sidaris's hands, it all proves rather tiresome, the deliberate trashiness becoming really boring, really quick.The plot to Malibu Express comes second to the macho posturing and female nudity, so I won't go into detail, other than to say that it's about industrial espionage and it's crap—not that the action is much better, consisting of poorly choreographed fight scenes, unconvincing shootouts, and the occasional car chase. Even worse is the comic relief, which comes in the form of a family of obnoxious, obese hicks who repeatedly challenge cowboy private eye Cody to drag races—imagine Enos from The Dukes of Hazzard, crossed with Sheriff J.W. Pepper from Bond, the Beverly Hillbillies, and those bikers from Every Which Way You Can, and you still won't come close to how inane and irritating these characters are.The women are, of course, all attractive (fat hillbilly mother and wheelchair-bound matriarch aside), all over-sexed, and all over the hero, meaning that there are regular bouts of soft-core sex. With such regular titillation on display, it soon loses its novelty factor. Who would have thought that big tits could become tedious? I had more fun keeping a mental tally of the shower scenes and marvelling at the treasure trove of now defunct technology that is on display throughout the film (Cody drives a Delorean, and is mighty proud of his pager and micro-cassette Dictaphone; bad guy Shane opted for Betamax to record his sex sessions).Malibu Express's wall-to-wall hot totty means that, according to my strict(ish) code, I am compelled to give the film a 4/10; Sybil Danning topless always earns another point, making it a 5 in total, but on no account take that rating as a recommendation.
Johnboy1221 Although this is just like the other Sadaris movies, with lots of T and A (and I'm not complaining about that), this one is way better than the others. Here's why: Darby Hinton. He is actually engaging, and he gives a fine, believable performance. For the ladies, he's exceptionally good looking, and built like a Greek God. He should have gone on to better things.Sybil Danning. She's always impressed me with her acting, and boy does she look sensational! I'd watch any film she's featured in.Good story. It's well-above the usual Sadaris films.This film has one major gaff in it. I don't recall ever seeing a movie in which a guy gets stabbed in the gut, and his wound is revealed before he's ever stabbed! What's with that? Funny, though. Sadaris should be able to "fix" that problem in a matter of minutes, with modern-day tech skills.I have this DVD, and wouldn't take anything for it. Well worth repeat viewing! Two thumbs up, even with the gaff!
gcoberly Hinton is charmingly alluring; the plot is inconsequential.From his cute days as Daniel Boone's son he has developed into a very handsome man - and you see "most" of him in this soft core flick along with costar Brent Clark who has a HOT shower scene. Actually Darby's most fleshy scene is also in the shower (great ass but no frontal male nudity in this film). Pool views of his torso, however, are definitely eye-candy. There is also a lot of attractive female skin for those who seek it, but not to the point that this is exclusively a "guy flick." Most of the characters are played with the same underdevelopment as they were written. Don't look for literature or drama here. But if you want light, frothy, sexual titillation... you've found it.
Coxer99 Andy Sidaris film simply made to show off the "talents" of numerous Playmates and Penthouse Pets. He then tries to mask the playmates by creating a murder mystery to keep the flow of the film going. This has become an ongoing trend in many of Sidaris' later films, which are kind of fun. Hinton plays a Magnum P.I.-wannabee who finds himself in a murder and in the clutches of sexy Sybil Danning. There's plenty of Playmates, sex and mystery to keep an audience entertained.