Karry Best movie of this year hands down!

Incannerax What a waste of my time!!!

Stoutor It's not great by any means, but it's a pretty good movie that didn't leave me filled with regret for investing time in it.

Roxie The thing I enjoyed most about the film is the fact that it doesn't shy away from being a super-sized-cliche;

RavenGlamDVDCollector Okay, I saw this when I was a youngster, late Seventies, it wasn't new then, already an old movie, shown as a midnight show. But it isn't midnight show material at all, not that I remember having any thoughts about that fact, no Sir, I was much too taken with Mary Tamm's long, shapely legs, thank you. Not that I knew the actress by name then, it was just, wow, that implied-nudity scene with the girl stepping out of her dress, barefoot, the calves... But decades later I needed a refresher course, I remembered the title, that it was actually a bummer notable mostly for the ridiculousness of a man falling in love with a demonic obviously if perversely feminine tree om which somebody carved out apparently 73W but actually it's an upside-down MEL. Much to my surprise, doing the research, downloading that bit, turns out it's ol' Alexis Lady DYNASTY herself back in her heyday (and look at those legs! red-painted toenails even! I'd never have thought... witchy Alexis you glamour doll! ) getting territorial with a tree and coming in a poor second.Anyway, recently saw Suzy Kendall in an episode of THE PERSUADERS!, "The Man In The Middle" and I just had to see more of that lovely, lovely girl, and when I found out on Wikipedia she was in TALES THAT WITNESS MADNESS I decided to go for seeing this old title on DVD, even though I had no recollection of her, bad sign.Was I disappointed. Was I! Small part, and she isn't nearly as great as in that episode where she was agent Kay Hunter, dream-girl deluxe. Two years later, still beautiful, but the gloss is gone, :( oh bummer. That's life.Oh for crying out loud take that tiger bit and you know what you can do with it---! Ditto for the two watchers. The Penny Farthing bit is blandly executed, of interest only because it is Suzy Kendall after all, even if a poor excuse of her abilities. The Joan Collins bit is kind of a classic. Sort of a Collector's Item in the true sense of the term, though I prefer my prize golden moments more glamorous, me being that RavenGlamDVDCollector guy with an eye for the chicks, but okay, DYNASTY fans won't believe Joan was ever in such dreck. Kinda hilariously good dreck but dreck none the less. As for the cannibalistic Luau bit, with that creepy old troll guy, I needn't explain my fascination with that one. Mary Tamm (who I hear is with us no more) was beautiful. Do I wanna see the butchery bits? Of bloody course not. Mary Tamm should have been in a decent movie, like Raquel Welch's FATHOM, if you catch my drift. :) Not this cut-up in a suitcase mess. Yuck! Anyway that meat looked yummy. I'm just saying.As for the bit on Wikipedia stating the opinion that Kim Novak gave the only weak performance, I think it's based on the first sight of the character, who appears shell-shocked. She is supposed to be that way. So, unfair comment, by people that never even paid attention.Make no mistake that this is very very off-beat and in many ways an embarrassment to watch. Especially the tiger and old bicycle bit. The trunk bit is such a hoot anybody could be forgiven for stooping so low as to watch it. As for the disturbing last segment, Mary Tamm has nice legs so okay I won't pursue that one any further. But at least I can now, almost four decades later, appreciate her in instant replay, freeze frame and slow motion. Isn't technology grand?Absolute junk but still a treasure trove.

BA_Harrison The portmanteau/anthology format is very hit and miss with many examples of the genre having at least one weak tale hidden amongst the good ones, or vice versa. Tales That Witness Madness, however, is fairly unique in that every segment—including the bizarre wraparound story—is a dud, meaning that usually dependable horror director Freddie Francis and his seasoned cast of character actors can do very little to prevent the film from being a crushing bore.Jennifer Jayne's nonsensical script sees Dr. Nicholas (Jack Hawkins) arriving at a futuristic hospital for the insane, where psychiatrist Dr. R.C. Tremayne (Donald Pleasance) is convinced that he has discovered what caused four of his patients to go mad. In order to convince his doubtful colleague, he recounts the details of each case: loony number one is Paul (Russell Lewis), a young boy whose imaginary friend Mr. Tiger proves to be very real indeed, devouring the lad's constantly bickering parents; patient number two, Timothy Patrick (Peter McEnery), loses his marbles after taking a trip into the past on a supernatural penny-farthing that is controlled by the ever-changing portrait of his Uncle Albert; fruitcake three, Brian (Micheal Jayston), kills his gorgeous wife (Joan Collins) in order to get it on with the malevolent tree trunk he brings into his home; and the last nutter is literary agent Auriol Pageant (Kim Novak) whose latest client, Hawaiian writer Kimo (Micheal Petrovitch), is planning a special feast with Auriol's tasty teenage daughter as the main course.After telling his unbelievable (and dreadfully dull) tales to a still sceptical Dr. Nicholas, the seemingly unhinged Tremayne is escorted to one of his own padded cells; shortly thereafter, Dr. Nicholas is paid a visit by Mr. Tiger!!! Dull, uninspired and cursed with some very lame 'twist' endings, this collection of dreadful tales offers horror fans very little to get excited about—with the exception of one scene that may be of particular interest to Evil Dead fans: Joan Collins' character is attacked by trees and creepers in the middle of a forest, the branches ripping off her clothes and groping her (body double's?) breasts. Sound familiar?3.5 out of 10, rounded up to 4 for presence of the lovely Joan Collins.

Coventry This was the last of the British horror anthology flicks from the late 60's/early 70's that I still had to see, and I intensely searched for it because I've always been a great fan of the Amicus formula. Some of their versatile portmanteau film rank highly among my list of favorites, like "The House that Dripped Blood" and "Asylum", and even the lesser qualitative efforts were nevertheless still very enjoyable. I don't know what exactly went wrong with the stories and set-up of "Tales that witness Madness", but it's a very inferior and severely disappointing film in comparison with all the other British anthology horror films from that era. The main issue lies in Jennifer Jayne's screenplay, which comes up with supernatural-themed stories full of absurd gimmicks, paradoxes and downright crazy situations. It already begins with a wannabe mysterious wraparound story in which a peculiarly behaving doctor – played by Donald Pleasance – guides a fellow doctor through the psychiatric ward of a mental institution and stops to elaborate on four of his heaviest cases. The first story is about an unhappy 8-year-old boy who seeks imaginary friendship with a tiger (!) because his parents continuously argue and neglects his needs. The boring and predictable build-up of the story is more or less compensated through a bloody climax, but "Mr. Tiger" nevertheless remains a senseless and dull quickie that appears to have been improvised at the spot by the actors. The second story opens potentially atmospheric and sinister, with an antique dealer slowly going deranged due to the evil influence of an ancient portrait that he baptized Uncle Albert. The portrait is somehow telepathically linked to a penny-farthing. Whenever the eyes of Uncle Albert force Timothy to ride the hi-wheeler, he gets teleported back in time and reincarnates as the man from the painting. I presume the initial set up was that the guy in the painting wanted him to witness 'something' in the park, but it never gets that far because Timothy's girlfriend sets fire to the penny-farthing. This segment slowly evolves from interesting into infuriatingly bad and ridicule, with time paradoxes and nonsensical symbolism about reincarnation. The third segment is a load of rubbish as well, but at least it's rubbish starring Joan Collins. Her husband develops a strange obsession for a piece of tree that he takes home and puts in the middle of the living room. I don't think that any woman would like a piece of rotting and moist wood in her house, but whenever Bella comes near the thing she suffers from nightmarish visions in which she gets raped in the woods. "Mel" is arguably the best story of the four, but still very silly and unmemorable. The final segment is possibly even twice as boring and inept as the three previous ones combined. By this time, my interest in the film had already vanished, but I seem to remember something about a really ugly guy sacrificing the virgin daughter of a wealthy high- society lady to a phallic statue and serving her flesh at the diner table. Sounds gruesome enough, but the story itself is slow-paced and unimaginably pretentious. "Tales that witness Madness" was one of my personal biggest disappointments ever. None of the stories can hold a candle to even the weakest segments of any other Amicus production and even the experienced veteran director Freddie Francis can't make the film remotely interesting.

Woodyanders Psychiatrist Dr. R.C. Tremayne (the always fine Donald Pleasence) and colleague Dr. Nicholas (Jack Hawkins in his final film role) investigate the case histories of four inmates being kept in an experimental asylum. 1st and most whimsical tale, "Mr. Tiger" - Little boy Paul Patterson (cute Russell Lewis) can't convince his constantly bickering parents (played to snarky perfection by Georgia Brown and Donald Houston) that his "imaginary" tiger friend is actually real. 2nd and most offbeat yarn, "Penny Farthing" - Timothy Patrick (likable Peter McEnery) purchases an antique bicycle which enables him to go back in time to the Victorian era where he meets fair maiden Beatrice (the extremely charming and comely Suzy Kendall). 3rd and most perverse segment, "Mel" - Jeolous, possessive housewife Bella Thompson (the ever classy and lovely Joan Collins) becomes really upset when her husband Brian (solid Michael Jayston) becomes infatuated with a sensuous, but lethal sentient tree (!). 4th and most twisted vignette, "Luau" - Stuck-up rich lady Auriol Pageant (a wonderfully radiant Kim Novak) holds a big bash in which the surprise ingredient in the meat turns out to be none other than her sweet virginal daughter Virginia (the stunningly gorgeous Mary Tamm). Director Freddie Francis, working from a witty and inspired script by British fright film scream queen Jennifer Jayne, handles the macabre material with his customary crisp and polished assurance, punctuating the grisly anecdotes with a nice, dry line in quirky black humor and offering up a fair amount of gore. Norman Warwick's slick, sparkling cinematography gives the picture an attractive glossy look. Bernard Ebbinghouse's alternately groovy and spooky score likewise scores a bull's eye. Deliciously droll fun.